Special Prayers for Kayla


Kayla with her dad and her aunt Susan

Today my blog is dedicated to Susan's niece Kayla, who will have her right leg amputated tomorrow due to cancer. To lose a limb is highly traumatic, but my fervent hopes and prayers are that the disease will be stopped forever through this procedure.

God bless, Kayla.

The Pale Little Pill that Packs a Punch



Doesn't look like much, does it? And yet, inside that small capsule dwells an enormous hope...the hope for a miracle. The wonder trial drug, Sutent, has already performed its miraculous wonders on me, by shrinking several of my tumors. It has unfortunately also caused me some grievous side effects, forcing my oncological team to twice reduce the dosage I was receiving. The hope is that this potent little pill will still be able to continue starving off the many tumors that are spreading throughout my body.

Today I was summoned to the CancerCare clinic, so Curtis came home early from work to drive me. We figured it wasn't safe for me to drive myself, with my better (left) eye swollen half shut. I was examined and given a prescription for some cortisone ointment to treat my skin eruptions, as well as my new supply of Sutent. I will resume treatment tomorrow. It should take only a couple of days for the drug to get rid of my facial swelling, and it remains to be seen how much less severe the side effects will hopefully be.

Today was a rough day, but it was brightened enormously by my first instant messenger chat with my Dutch blogfriend, Herman. We communicated wonderfully well with a mishmash of surprisingly good English on his part, and clumsy but intelligible Dutch on mine. It's great fun to exercise my rusty language skills, and I was given the special treat of a webcam video of Herman speaking to me in his warm friendly voice.

Then, minutes later, my dear friend Sharon, a former colleague who is now an artist and much-published author, emailed me one of her most recent articles. It was a delightful confection about "Hebonics," a language unique to English-speaking Jews that she describes in hilarious detail. Made me laugh out loud (which hurts my swollen puss, by the way). Aren't I lucky to have such great friends who try so hard to bring some joy into my life?

Every day is indeed a blessing.

News From the Donut Queen



Not only do I enjoy eating donuts, but recently I have taken to wearing one. In fact, I am sitting on one even as I type this. And I really do wear it, because whenever I stand up, it sticks to the back of my legs. Quite the fashion statement. One loses one's sense of embarrassment after a solid week of the scoots. Anything for relief from the pain....

I saw my drug trial nurse, Pat, today, and she didn't like the way my hands and feet looked; she liked my ongoing problem with diahrrea even less. (Can't say I'm too fond of it myself.) So she wants me to rest from the drug for at least a few days until I can resolve some of these issues, after which I will resume the Sutent at a reduced dosage. She gave me some advice on how to slow down my bowels and deal with the hemmorhoid problem, and told me to call her tomorrow to report how I'm doing, and again on Monday to see if I'm any better.

I know that this means my face will puff up like a blowfish again in a few days, but that will go away after I've been back on the drug for 3 or 4 days.

Hopefully, the reduced dosage will also result in reduced side effects, and the drug will still be strong enough to do its job. The fact that it has already shrunk some tumors is very encouraging and exciting. I haven't lost hope yet!

I was so glad to hear that, after almost 10 years, an arrest has finally been made of the murderer of beautiful little Jon Benet Ramsay. Although her much-maligned mother Patsy knew that an arrest was imminent, she never lived to see her daughter's killer brought to justice. Ovarian cancer that metastasized to her brain took her life this past June. At least her name has finally been cleared. May she rest in peace now.

Just Peachy



This morning we had lightning and heavy thunder, so I shut down my computer (it's normally on all the time) and whipped up a couple of batches of homemade peach jam. I've been waiting all summer for the peaches to get fat and juicy, and they finally did; so it was time. A while ago I heard the loud satisfying pops that tell me that the jars have properly sealed themselves and all has turned out well.

Curtis' tooth extraction went much more smoothly than expected; even the dental surgeon looked at the large molar in his pliers with surprise and said, well that was easy. A piece of the root broke off, but it popped out of the socket all on its own. No stitches required, no swelling, and no pain. What a relief. Curtis went to work as usual the next day and claimed no discomfort.

We had a downpour of much-needed rain this morning, so there may be some hope for the flowers that still survive in my garden. Our tomatoes are beginning to ripen; we had a wonderful feed of toasted yellow tomato sandwiches the other day that was nothing short of sublime. (I recommend the low-acid yellow tomato to those of you with tummy or mouth sensitivities.)

Now it's time to see if my tender tongue will stand the rigours of a scrumptious blueberry Krispy Kreme. Somehow, I think I'll suffer through it.

Yummy.

The Perfect Weekend


The beautiful courtyard area at the inn where we stayed. No cooking, no cleaning, no bed-making: ahhhhhhhhhh!

Curtis and I had a wonderful time in Grand Forks, ND. You can read a full report and see photos of our fabulous accommodations over at his site, Canuckville.

As Curtis mentioned, we ate simply but well. I enjoyed Campbells, not only because of their delicious char-broiled burgers, but because being able to order 1/2 sandwich suited my diminished appetite perfectly. I held up very well during all of our shopping, never using any of the power carts but operating on my own steam.

I LOVE American grocery stores: Such variety! Such amazingly low prices! If not for the ban on importing meats and produce, I would have wrestled half a cow and a flock of former chickens, as well as some killer frozen products, into our truck to take home. I settled for a few tons of incredibly cheap bread maker mix, which for some reason has disappeared from the shelves of Canadian grocery stores. The heavenly aroma of baking bread will be permeating our house for some time to come.

We bought lots of clothes for Curtis (Big K has a great big and tall men's section); some tools for his work; towels; a beautiful bed in a bag set (I LOVES me some new bedding - washed the sheets when we got home and we slept in em last night); a lot of sundries like liquid hand soap, shampoo and body wash; a set of hot rollers for moi, and (drum roll please) a gorgeous new winter coat for yours truly. Woo hoo! First new coat I've bought in about three or four years. It's been 85-100 degrees fahrenheit here lately, but I know from past experience that in about four months, temperatures will plummet to sub-Arctic, and then I will be bundling up in style. I had Curtis chortling as I cat-walked through the house in my lovely new garment, singin the theme song to the Miss Canada pageant. We spent far too much money, declared our purchases honestly at the border, paid the obligatory taxes good-naturedly, and happily stowed away our newly bought treasures when we got home to our welcoming kitties.

And we have two dozen (well, minus a few....grin) KRISPY KREMES sittin on our kitchen counter.

Life is good.

Today, Curtis will return from work at noon to pick me up so I can accompany him to the dental surgeon for the extraction of a troublesome molar. His dentist referred him to a specialist because the tooth, he said, has long roots which are encased by "a lot of bone structure." Sounded ouchy, so I want to be available to drive Curtis home after the procedure. I hope it doesn't cause him too much discomfort, and that he is prescribed lots of good drugs. I guess the party's over.

Another One Bites the Dust



I used to really like Mel Gibson, I mean REALLY like him. But then again, I used to really like Tom Cruise. It's a good thing Curtis found me, because, historically, my taste in men seems to be very questionable.

I have never regarded drunkenness as an excuse for bad behaviour, and what disturbs me even more than Gibson's anti-Semetic remarks, is that he got behind the wheel of a motor vehicle, stinking drunk. There's no excuse for that; after all, he can easily afford a driver/limo/cab. He's darn lucky he never killed someone.

So now he's going to have to try to do a lot of damage control. Will I boycott his movies? No, I have never confused celebrity with morality. But he will no longer put stars in my eyes. Oh well.

I subscribed to the Big Brother live feeds again this year. They've been very boring, and the harrassment and abuse by trolls in the chat has been worse than ever, despite RealPlayer's promises last year to create a more secure sign-in system. Last night was the last straw: An individual who has been observing our "regular" group's chat for some time (some of us have become friends over the past few seasons, and keep in touch between airings of the program), saw fit to say he hoped I die very soon from my cancer. He also begged another chatter to die quickly from her severe diabetes. Nice.

I don't know why that hit me like a fist in the stomach, but it did. I am deeply dismayed by the hatred that fills some people, and I'm tired of random acts of cruelty. From now on I will seek the sanctity of a private chat room with a small number of trusted friends, and avoid the stress of open chat.

I don't know why anonymity and/or alcohol abuse gives some people a sense of entitlement to lash out so venomously. I can only be thankful that my heart has never been that dark, and pity those who are afflicted.